No self-respecting woman would watch Twilight

Twilight, the epic series...oops saga is about a love story between a vampire and a really clumsy/stubborn girl and about the complications in their relationship.No it isn`t another one of those sugar coated cute rom-coms that girls like. But infact Twilight is nothing less than a catastrophe made to ruin girls` minds. This is one of those epic disasters that while watching the viewer would feel that his intelligence is being ridiculed.Here are some problems that i have with Twilight:

Ruining the vampire`s image:-Vampires are blood sucking monsters that are supposed to scare your guts out.Vampires die when exposed to sunlight,they do NOT sparkle like some gay tooth fairies(Yes! vampires in this film actually sparkle when exposed to sunlight).Vampires are supposed to be scary not beautiful! Stephenie has made hundred`s of references in the novel expressing the beauty of Edward Cullen.Edward has no fangs and neither has the urge to drink blood.Apparently he is a "vegetarian" vampire which means that he sucks on animals and not humans.Vegetarian?? Can there be a bigger mockery of VampireS?

Twilight is stephenie`s wet dream:
A muscular werewolf with 6 pack Abs,a myserious "beautiful" vampire all behind an average clumsy,i-always-get-into-trouble girl Bella...Yes! Twilight is nothing more than a wet dream that Stephenie had. Most of the pages describe Edward`s beauty with traits such as bronze hair and topaz eyes.Edward is nothing but a fictional pansy vampire who is made of some white stone and sparkles.Stephenie Meyer`s "wet" dream man whom she sleeps with in lala-land only cause there is no one in real life ready to sleep with her.


Twilight is not for the self respecting female:
Bella is a teenager who is ready to give up everything-from her family to her friends to even giving up pursuing higher studies all just to be with Edward.Their love isn`t romantic but stalker-ish and really really disturbing! Edward follows where ever Bella goes and even secretly stares at her when she sleeps(Bella actually is delighted when she comes to know this,a normal girl would get totally freaked out).Apart from this, the entire relationship is controlled by Edward. He takes a break from the relationship when he wishes too and comes back when he wishes too(New moon),he over-rules her opinions.When Edward leaves her,Bella goes into depression mode and turns into a lifeless "zombie" for several months until Edward returns. Bella is toally dependant on Edward and is helpless and loses all her happiness when Edward leaves.In the later stages of New Moon, Bella figures out that she hears Edward`s voice when ever she tries to cheat death and so creates many haphazard situations for herself just in order to hear Edward`s voice(delusion).There is also a situation where Bella gets "bitch"napped by a character called James and instead of fighting for her life all she does is sit back and wait for Edward to come and rescue her.

Girls(twilight fans) this ain`t true love,this is insulting yourself! Learn to respect yourself and your identity,don`t idolize a woman who is submissive,non self depandant and insecure like Bella.


Character Development:
One of the reasons why Lord of the Rings is miles ahead of Harry Potter which in turn in miles ahead of Twilight is because of character development! Twilight displays absolute zero character development.All there is needed to be known about the character can be deduced within a few minutes.Edward is a cardboard cutout character with no personality and is there only to provide eye candy for the teen-age girls.20% of the books is filled with references of Edward`s "beauty".




The Awful Writing:
Stephenie deliberately makes her writing complicated but don`t be fooled, she is just pretentious and does this to sound intelligent.For example the words "small town" becomes "diminutive municipality","Yellow" becomes "topaz". There are such horrible wrong context of usage of words in almost every page.

Rightly said by writer Stephen King(His works have been made into movies like Shawshank Redemption,Green mile,The shining,the mist etc) -"J.K Rowling is a terrefic writer but Stephenie Meyer can`t write worth a darn"




The fangirls:
If you think the sickening characters,the worthless plots and the horrendous writing are bad than let me assure you that they aren`t the worst.What`s worse are the fangirls! Twilight fans are little obnoxious teenage girls who would be ready to sell their souls to satan in order to get a chance to meet Edward or Jacob.These fans have divided themselves into "team edward" and "team jacob" and bitch slap each other in internet forums. Their obsession for Edward makes me doubt if they are lesbians? Because it is obvious that Edward wears lipstick, it is impossible not to notice it while watching the movie(god imagine Indian girls idolizing Uday chopra of niel n nikki who also puts on lipstick). The girls who idolize the character Jacob, makes me wonder if they are pedophiles? Jacob is a friendly werewolf who was in love(one sided) with Bella throughtout the series and in the finale falls in love with Edward and Bella`s "baby"!! thats right BABY!!

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P.S I am no fan of harry potter/transformers/lord of the rings

P.P.S Sorry have been bashing alot in my blog recently(but if you cared to notice i don`t bash just for the sake of it,there is always some deep meaning in the blog posts where i bash) anyway promise to come up with some non bashful posts in the future

P.P.P.S Although kristen`s one expression biting-the-lips acting sucked in Twilight,she was awesome in a movie called PANIC ROOM and she even played a small but delicious role in a cult movie called INTO THE WILD. Robert was ok in harry potter but sucks in all his other films while i have not seen any other movie of Taylow Lautner.

P.P.P.P.S I admit i did`nt the read the books completely in one go,just read in parts..believe me i tried...but..just...could`nt!

P.P.P.P.P.S Below is a pic of an actual conversation i had with an ex-gf
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